If I’ve learned anything since my daughter became a teenager it is that shopping with her for any article of clothing requires that I abide by a very stringent set of rules lest I run from the dressing room like a mad, raving lunatic SCREAMING for help. Yes, that is correct. Gone are the days where we would skip hand-in-hand into girly twirly clothing stores and bee-boppin to the sugar coated lyrics of Taylor Swift. I wistfully recall during those past shopping excursions I would thumb through racks and each outfit I’d pull out and show to her would illicit squeals of delight as she’d nod her head in happy agreement and embrace each new article of clothing with a full and open spirit. In other words – my opinions, my tastes were put on this uber high pedestal which she would never even CONSIDER vetoing. It was heaven.
Fast forward to the present day and here is a window into what it is like to shop with my teen. First and foremost I think she would rather CUT OFF HER HAND than be seen holding mine in hers in THE MALL. So we walk in, her a few paces ahead of me lest anyone ((i.e. other teens she might peripherally know ) think this shopping trip is a JOY RIDE and not simply utilitarian- as in she is not happy to be doing it but it is a necessary evil to get yet another pair of completely overpriced shredded jeans.
So if you too are about to embark on a shopping trip to the mall with a less than enthusiastic teen here are some SURVIVAL TIPS.
#1 Do not offer your opinion UNLESS it is expressly asked for. For example when your daughter takes an article of clothing off the rack which you deem is just NOT something that you would ever choose for her to wear- KEEP YOUR LIPS ZIPPED. Chances are the minute you say you DON’T like said outfit is the very instant when said outfit becomes THE OUTFIT YOUR TEEN MUST GET.
#2 Do not even THINK about choosing some outfits for your daughter to try on and BRING SAID OUTFITS INTO THE DRESSING ROOM. That is the perfect cataclysmic storm that might have her believing that you are ” TRYING TO CONTROL HER LIFE”. Remember teens like to believe THEY are in the driver’s seat.
#3 When the negative self talk begins ( as it eventually does) do not try and quote optimistic life advice from Oprah or Brene Brown. Of course if you can find some inspiration that has been shared by Shawn Mendes or Zoella by all means- SHARE IT!
#4 A trip to Starbucks ultimately makes everyone smile ( except your husband).